Ghost of My Past
by Claire Lafleur
Summary: time stops and everything seems perfect  She feels happy... too happy. She hasn't been this happy since she was still on speaking terms with another boy...   FOR THE P!NK CHALLENGE on THE HPFC FORUM


**For the P!nk Challenge on the HPFC Forum**

**Just Like a Pill :::: hysteria & apprehensive **

The crowd cheered and hollered as the red and gold blurs sped towards the ground. The beaters, dropping their brooms and bats, hoisted their triumphant seeker onto their shoulders as she pumped the fist that enclosed the snitch in the air.

As the scene of euphoria played out in front of him, James Potter leaned on his broom and smiled at his fellow Gryffindors, who slapped his back in congratulations on their way to join the crowd at the seeker's feet.

Lily leaned against the stands and smiled, not at the mass of fellow Gryffindors, but at the _Head_ _Boy_ Gryffindor  
_quidditch_ _captain_ Gryffindor  
James Potter, theGryffindor

He sees her looking over at him, with a twinkle in her eye, a twinkle that duplicates in his as he makes his way over to her. He half expects her to run away, like she did before, but she doesn't.  
"Hey Evans," he says, standing a bit farther away from her than was normal, testing the waters, "I didn't think you knew were the quidditch pitch was."

She doesn't say anything, just looks at him, the twinkle in her eye doubling and a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

Why was she so happy? She didn't know and neither did he, but he didn't care. All he knew was that she was still standing there, and he was wasting time.

"Did you, um, enjoy the match?" he blurts out, not wanting anymore silence to fill this moment of (nearly) perfect perfection.

She laughs at this absurd question (they both knew she didn't understand this game in the slightest).

time stops and everything seems perfect  
she feels happy... too happy.

She hasn't been this happy since she was still on speaking terms with another boy... The _Slytherin_ boy, Snape.

The smile slowly fades from Lily Evans' face

_***flashback***__****_

_**tear stains**__**  
**__**t a n g l e d hair**__**  
**__**WriNkLed sHeeTS**_

_****__**-SOLITUDE-**_

_**, it stares you in the face**__**  
**__**hungry, already consuming you.**__****_

_**You're only half of what you used to be, and you'll probably be gone soon. But oh, it's not your fault and if only he was there to fix you. But he isn't yours anymore. He's gone and nothing's gunna fix that.**_

"Um, Lily, are you okay?"

As Lily comes back to herself, she realizes James is waving his hand in front of her nose, looking very worried.

She took a quick step back and looked around frantically, as if she were surrounded by boggarts and had only just realized it.

"Lily?" James asked again.

Lily just stared at the grass, trying very hard to not _**cry**_.

She could not, WOULD NOT, let _**it**_ happen again.

No one would ever _**hurt**_ her like _**he**_ did, again.

"Lily!"

James was now very worried.

She looked up at him, her starry eyes filled with horror.

She backed away slowly, acting as though James would attack her if she made any sudden movements.

"Lily, I –"

But, before James could say what he was, Lily had turned and _**run**_.

She disappeared into the crowed of Gryffindors, and though James shouted for her to come back, she ignored him and continued to push through the celebrating students until, at last, she was out of that mob. She scampered out of the pitch, up the hill, and toward the castle. As she approached the main entrance, she turned toward a narrowly descending stair case that seemed to go on forever, but actually ended at the old boathouse.

It was her go-to-when-all-hope-is-lost spot, and it always had been. Though, she hadn't been there in a _**long time**_.

**a/n: For the P!nk enthusiasts that are listening to this song right now. These are some note I made when writing this. They may not make much sense, but I had to share them :P**

'**Pill' = Snape**

'**Life Support/Morphine' = Blindness to Snape's dark side. **

'**Frustrated Fears' = James**

**Help =James**

'**all of the other pills, they were different' = you (Snape) used to be different. You would reassure me & help me & that's what made our friendship work. But now, you hurt me & stress me & that's not how it's (friendship) is supposed to work. You're not my friend anymore, that person is gone & I don't he'll come back. [Lily to Snape… in her head]**

'**I tried to call the nurse again but she's being a little bitch' = & maybe that makes me a bad person (giving up on you) but I can't help it anymore 'cause you're really hurting me. [Lily to Snape… in her head]**


End file.
